The poem below includes a list of some forty men; but it should not be considered a definitive roll-call of all the menfolk who have made an impression upon me. Certainly I have only included chaps up to my meeting Richard (my partner 2001 - 2012 but still my best friend); so, none of the male friends / acquaintances I have since made appear. Some men about whom I have written specific poems (though not all [yet] published on this blog) have also been excluded, as I did not feel I had something fresh to add. An example, would be the previous poem about musician Paul. Some names [may] have been altered in order to protect individual men or even myself. Inclusion on the list / in this poem should not be read to mean I had a crush on or fell in love with any specific individual; though most I have loved in the philia sense and some verged on bromance! Bear in mind, these are my recollections and reminiscences and, as such, may not be recognised by all parties concerned - especially those not so confident with their own sense of self &/or sexuality.
*Please note part II of this poem contains sexual imagery & language.*
Manhood
“Tu jahan chalega”
I
thanks to all the men
who added to the man
I was
became
and am
to become
each a step
to my manhood
to my self
facets of the father
I should have known
but never would
of the brother
I might have known
but never could
each hand
each smile
each laugh
leading me on
to adulthood
each failed promise
each dashed hope
each broken heart
played its necessary part
taught me loyalty
though no fealty
to anyone
only me
and now
he
II
Red-headed Simon’s lascivious erubescence and vacillation
Inebriate Simon’s bear-hugs and concupiscent indecision
Policeman Michael’s off-duty hunt and lust declaration
Anglo-Pole Czeslaw’s white-undied romps and motorbike erection
Cousin David’s stolidity and (straight) porn collection
Anglo-Greek Nick’s failed dates and not-to-be-put-off determination
Engineer Jeff’s love affirmation and final rejection
Lorry-driver Brian’s unconventionality and accepting reception
Accountant Denis’ acceptance-with-joy and shoulder-to-cry-on
School-mate Ken’s relaxed heterosexuality and hopeless romanticism
Collegiate Simon-Peter’s constant flirtation and Persian exoticism
Neighbour Jed’s humour, gorgeous spouse and offer of troilism
Fireman Keith’s handy wank and sexual dilettantism
Pater Keith’s drunken distance and illogical stance
Polish Peter’s love-will-find-a-way and perseverance
Gay Paul’s writing-creativity and irrisistible self-confidence
Fire-chief David’s musculature and unconditional acceptance
Grandfather Cyril’s active dislike and standoffishness
Brother Tony’s posturing machismo and neediness
Married, electrician Keith’s bisexual pursuit and doggedness
DSS Trevor’s reddening feathers and solicitous kindness
Taxman David’s quiet charm and nestling flesh
Doctor Paul’s eirenic calm and shared little death
Reverend Mike’s egomania and religious hypocrisy
Dairyman Brett’s rain-drenched snog and self-imposed naïveté
Teacher Chris’ radiant smile, nudity and hirsute tactility
GP Mark’s chipper personality and confidence in me
Fellow churchgoer Chris’ late-night chats and car natter
School-chum Harry’s confirmed bachelor dishevelment and clutter
Privileged Guy’s disdain for personal hygiene and love of literature
Taxman Luther’s best man and doting family guy
Austrian Georg’s everlasting smile and infectious chuckle
Pen-pal Christian’s welcoming family and elder-brother mantle
Grandfather Doug’s eye for a beauty and a quality vehicle
Architect Ivan’s firm thighs and slumber snuggle
Grandfather Horace’s sunday walks and salutatory kiss
On the make drug-dealer Chris and his honeyed dick
Psychologist Graeme’s ego-boost selection and stolen kiss
Salop Carl’s Œdipal fear and self-loathing
“I’m straight” Greg’s passionate Paradise embrace and perfect kiss
And the greatest influence thus far
Rico’s love, patience and long-suffering
He
Believe it or not, this is the video that prompted this poem!
