Computer-Usage for pwME or other Chronic Illnesses

One of the M.E. Charities recently requested tips for folk using computers and other similar technology, such as smartphones and tablets. I waded in with my suggestions.

[Image description: open, working laptop]

My twelve tips for computer-usage by people with Myalgic Encephalomyelitis (pwME) or other chronic illnesses: medical conditions appear in parenthesis after the suggestion.

1.    turn the brightness to the lowest level at which one can still read comfortably (photophobia);

2.    some will find dark-mode is easier to read (white text on black background) (photophobia);

3.       turn on night-mode whenever needed (this filters out blue-spectrum light) or use an app that does the same thing, e.g. f.lux (photophobia);

4. avoid watching programme-streaming, videos and gifs (equilibrioception, dizziness, nausea);

5.    turn off or turn down sound to lowest needed level (hyperacuity);

6.    use services such as Feedly, which gather news and just list headlines (concentration, memory);

7.    use calendar/diary, e-post-it/stickies, spreadsheets/word-processing to create lists of to-do activities (memory);

8.    order shopping on-line, where possible, as it saves spoons (fatigue, etc.);

9.    use on-line/mobile banking to avoid telephoning or visiting banks, etc. (fatigue, etc.);

10.    use email wherever possible, as there is a written record (unlike face-to-face visits or telephone-calls) in case one forgets (memory);

11.    use speech-recognition software if physically using a keyboard is an issue (fatigue, pain);

12.    various types of stands, including some that are similar to a cushion, can be purchased/made (if one is crafty or has a good friend who is) to hold or lean one’s technology against, so negating the need to hold/grip (fatigue, pain).

*

If the reader has any other good tips, please be at liberty to add them in the comments below.

*

I Keep Feeling

[TRIGGER WARNING: this post deals with child-abuse and references suicide and blood!]

I have hinted at my childhood issues in some past postings.

Of late I have been much affected and effected by the abuse I suffered at the hands of both parents, not only in childhood, but through my adolescence, my young adulthood and to a lesser extent into my mid-adulthood. Eventually, in my mid-thirties, my psychiatrist, my psychologist and my G.P. (family doctor) strongly advised me to completely separate myself from them. I followed their advice and did so. Since then they have divorced and moved to different places, but I do not know exactly their whereabouts - and I want to keep it that way.

Over the years various good friends have suggested I sue my parents or lodge complaints with the police. Unfortunately, such proceedings would mean I should have to relive the horrors over and over again to the police, to lawyers and before the Courts. That, for me, is too large a price to pay for Justice. I prefer to direct my energies and efforts into healing as best I can and living my life the way I want to live it.

I know from my paternal Grandmother that my paternal Grandfather was brutal in his treatment of my Father. I know from my Aunts that my maternal Grandfather was abusive towards my Mother & her siblings. This may explain the abuse my parents meted out: it does NOT justify nor vindicate their behaviours one iota.

Several times prior to the split from my abusers, I attempted suicide; but since then I have not even contemplated same - other than for end-of-life and living-will purposes. I have become, at least partially, the happy and confident chap I should have been all along.

I am publishing the poem below and this brief preamble, not to garner sympathy, but rather with the aspiration that someone may find it useful to know that life does get better, that there is always Hope.

*

after so many years

       of mental justification

       of emotional turmoil

       of spiritual malaise

       of medication

              I stopped taking them

       at fifty-three

expecting liberation

scary initially

honestly

       I am still scared

so much anxiety

too many feels

       maybe

but good

       has the upper-hand

              I am certain

I feel music again

my bodily pleasures

       returned

re-awakened creativity

slumbering sexuality

       re-asserted

though no princely kiss yet

I feel me again

I keep smiling

I keep crying

I keep feeling

       impotent

       despondent

frankly

       I am still scarred

I keep sensing

       that putrescent

              touch

       veining my soul

my heart turned

       to cold

              stone

I keep smelling

       your odious stench

       polluting all memory

I used to feel nothing

       for you

              who made no effort

                     to atone

but you keep popping up

an unsolicited smear

never sufficient

       bruises nor blood

never enough torment

       torture

       fear

abused childhood

abused adolescence

abused adulthood

equilibrium tired

hope expired

       turned to a putative hate

mostly

       I just want the thoughts

              of you

              of your actions

              your nefandous deeds

                     to go away

                     to stay at bay

I keep feeling

       exhausted

       drained

longing for Fate

       to resolve

              your evil

for it has cleaved

       my soul

       my psyche

no salve

no surgery

       can heal

              the scars of cruelty

but I soldier on

       like a good boy

and I keep feeling

       never joy

       but contentment

certainly

       in your absence

              I have grown

                     in confidence

                     in maturity

                     in sagacity

I feel…

       well…

              half-alive

                     maybe

paradoxically

       I keep feeling

              worthy

                     of Love

                     of Life

almost

       happy

but still

       as ever

              that small boy

                     eternally

                            lost

I cannot stop

       now

I just have to

       keep feeling

              the pain

desperate to attain

       calmness

       cleansing

       healing

       release

I keep feeling

Hand-Hold: a Poem

Hand-hold


I am Hermes
flying towards
and onwards
past the Sun
onto Saturn
and Jupiter
caressing Venus
stroking Luna
and its seas

only us
in the moment
in eternity
ceaselessly
in exquisite
torment
in acquiescent
passion
in exuberant
passivity
in mutual trust

I feel
your warmth
the palmar creases
traversing
your so-white
freckled skin
the softness
the tenderness
the shining light
of the self
that let me in
the firmness
of your grip
holding on
longer than necessary
not as long as needed
callouses from travail
tickle a thrill
all through
what is essential
we two

does it matter?
really
I hardly knew you
even less today
yet constantly
together
love?
yes probably
true-love?
divine peace
maybe

whatever
hearts elate
pulses race
orbs coruscate
regard the other’s
sweet, laughing smile
flushing cheeks
David & Jonathan
mates

a lack of speech
nothing
and yet
everything
was uttered
in ever-yesterday

hands touch
vigorously
playfully
lovingly
forearms
elbows
shoulders
backs
lumbers
forelegs
thighs
chests
above a heart
cupping faces
stroking halses

feet touch
humorously
in horse-play
one or other
socked foot
even
and more often
a wobbly
gluteus maximus

fingers touch
oh-so-lightly
a warm, hirsute thigh
a necklace-wrinkled throat
a freshly shaven chin
smooth lips

lips touch
truthfully
erubescent cheeks
silken, Nordic-blond cilia
standing to attention
moistened in the motion
to such pliant labia

thirty-five years later
in my mind’s-eye
images so clear
still seeing you laugh
at the sea-side
soaking-wet fun
a silent-film
from a penny-slot
no recollection…
no sound

only our hands touch
in amity dear

in memory
always
now

You
Aries
philia
my left-hand
my long-lost, old chum
not quite straight
not quite gay
pondering chat

we
Librans
invariably
require balance
and so

Gran
Leo
storge
my right-hand
my maternal confidante
dead but ever near
alive to me
listening chat

rooting me
spiritually
my common-sense
both essential threads
of feeling loved and
my incipient confidence

and yes
I grasp
I am happy
if that is all
if that is that

for ever in reciprocity
our hand-hold
perpetual
clasp

 

The Mangle (Wringer)

The sun is shining from a beautifully clear azure firmament this fine day. The air is mild and light zephyrs are rustling the desiccating leaves yet to fall from their boughs. It's a perfect autumnal day for getting outside in one's garden and doing some desperately needed tidying, pruning, lopping, etc. in between the more normal rains and blusteriness of this time of year.

[Image description: a dishevelled corner of the writer's garden]

Alas, today I am bed-bound. I cannot even descend the stairs to hobble out to just inspect my garden. All I can do is stare out of my window from my prone position in the bed and watch the occasional fluffy cotton-wool cloud float by and listen to the rustling trees whisper to one another.

Normally, this would be sufficient to lift my spirits; but for some unknown reason today I feel rather down.

Reflecting on why this may be so, I wonder whether it is related to my review and re-assessment last week by social services - my social worker is a lovely lady by the by.

At this time of year I am bed-bound approximately two in every three days. Most of the days I am not bed-bound I am house-bound. I have to turn more to the internet to do my shopping, as I increasingly find it difficult to go out and certainly do not do so on my own now, as my memory difficulties and dyscognition deteriorate. Over the year I average some fourteen-and-a-half hours of (unrefreshing) sleep per day; however at this time of year it can increase to almost twenty-four hours per day. Perhaps I am simply rueing the coming brumal months and my enforced hibernation.

Maybe, I am more upset that my social worker is keeping my assessment as unchanged. Apparently it is fine to only be able to: eat once per day; clean oneself every two to four days; change clothing every two to four days; etc. Thirty minutes Monday through Thursday to prepare a hot meal is considered to be sufficient for my needs. My bedding has not been changed in a month - social services do not cover that kind of thing believe it or not. Lord knows what level of service other folks receive.

I have worked for the State in two different capacities. I have paid tens of thousands in taxes. But now I am disabled and chronically ill, the State does not really want to know. At least that is how it feels…

Castigated, disparaged, ignored, resented - I feel like a burden. Personally, I blame the neo-liberal politicos and their cronies. Occasionally, I wish they would all be afflicted with temporary disability &/or chronic illness, long enough for them to be forced to claim State benefits and let them go through the DWP mangle. Perhaps then they might develop some sympathy, even empathy, for those of us who are less fortunate. Maybe then they would reform the DWP to work for we citizens and not agin us. Perhaps!



To press for changes to DWP, please sign WoWpetition.

Bedside Table

For once there will not be a photograph of my own bedside table to accompany this blog-post. I value the privacy of my bed-cell and do not like to be photographed therein. Nor do I want my personal space exposed to the world. It is my hidey-hole from the nastiness without. Goodness knows what this says about me psychologically! However, the image below is of an IKEA Dalom wooden table and represents the actual piece of furniture I own.

© IKEA

I shall nonetheless list what is to be found on my wee table.

A hands-free telephone - I do not use it to make calls, but do pick up messages when up to doing so.

A lamp to light my way when: my sleep patterns are inverted; I am kept awake with pain; or, I am just suffering an insomnient bout.

A photograph of me and my best friend from when we first met.

A rosary with cross blessed by a holy man in Brazil and gifted to me by a friend. It reminds me to count my blessings: including that I have been given the gift of friendship by not only said giver but also many other beautiful individuals.

A melamine beaker with a facsimile of an original E.H.Shepard Winnie the Pooh illustration. It's not a glass because I knock them off occasionally during fevers, glassware has a habit of breaking, and I am in no state to clear up the débris.

A memory-stick for saving (when I remember to do so!) documents I write on the laptop.

A wrist-watch so I know the day and time as my ability to internally metre their passing has long since expired.

A mobile telephone for receiving and sending text communications on the rare occasions that I cannot use social media.

A selection of pain-killers, drops, antihistamines and other medications as, for the majority of the time I'm stuck in bed, and so can self-medicate.

A selection of chill-out music for those rare occasions when I feel able to listen to a whole album or can tolerate background noise.

A pile of paperwork (notes, papers & receipts) that I keep meaning to sort through, but which I never seem to find the desire nor energy to pursue.

Additionally, under the table leans:

A bag of potential reading matter (newspapers, magazines, books, brochures, pamphlets) for those occasions when I can read and comprehend more than short bursts of text.

A box of man-size tissues for the symptoms of my constant and various allergies.

A laptop - my main means of communication and socialising; a godsend.

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This article is feeding into Liz Crow's artwork #beddingout which will 'occur' at the Edinburgh Fringe from today until 26th August and via Twitter using the aforesaid hashtag. For more details please go to Bedding Out in Edinburgh.

To sign the WoWpetition or just to find out more about its aims go to wowpetition.com.

Criquaer's Book List

This list of some 500 tomes reflects those books that I have enjoyed and re-read or those that have had some significant influence on my thinking or impact on my psyche. The reader will note the list includes various literary genres including: anthology, art, autobiography, biography, children’s, classic, comedy, contemporary, detective, devotional, dictionary, faction, fairy tale, fantasy, French, German, historical, history, magic realism, mystery, philosophy, play, poetry, popular, queer, religious, science fiction, sexuality, short story, Spanish, theology and even one Western! In other words, my tastes are rather eclectic.

I learned to read and write with the assistance of my maternal grandmother. Crippled with arthritis, she could not hold pens; so she wrote the letters with her fingers on my back. I suspect this had something to do with my word-based memory.

My first real memory of the joy of books is from Christmas Day after my fifth birthday. I had requested books from Father Christmas. To my utter astonishment I was presented with a book-shelf’s worth of Enid Blyton’s works in hardback. I devoured them. She may be distinctly unfashionable these days, but a couple have made my roll of honour.

By Christmas in the year I was eight, I had completed my junior school’s entire reading scheme. Up to the age of eleven I chose freely from the shelves in classrooms and the school library. This gave me the opportunity to read the majority of children’s classics as well as delving into dusty encyclopædias.

With my weekly visit to the public library, I also ploughed through everything not on loan. Eventually, I was even granted the special dispensation of one adult ticket so I could borrow from their much more extensive collection of science-fiction novels. 

To iterate my eccentricity, in my secondary-school years I would regularly read a page of my English dictionary then extinguish the light before slumbering; well, on nights when I was not memorising French or German vocabs!

My current home has a library on the first floor with a lovely view over the communal green. However, the reclining-chair faces inwards so as nothing can distract from the joys of the printed word. Alas, the library is insufficently capacious to contain my whole collection. Every room in the house has a bank of books, even if merely a pile in each of the bathrooms.

Many of the works I hold dear, I re-read periodically. They are constant friends which can be relied upon to fulfil the need for Gemütlichkeit - comfort and familiarity and cosy emotions.

The images and various translations of the same work ought to give one an idea of my all-time favourite read (*). I hope my list includes one of your favourites - but if not let me know what you would select and why!

A Boy's Own Story by Edmund White (1982)

A Child in Time by Ian McEwan (1987)

A Children's English History in Verse by Ernest Pertwee (1906)

A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens (1843)

A Dictionary of Angels including the fallen Angels by Gustav Davidson (1967)

A Distant Likeness by Paul Bailey (1973)

A Handbook of Angels by H.C.Moolenburgh (1995)

A Handful of Dust by Evelyn Waugh (1934)

A Home at the End of the World by Michael Cunningham (1990)

A Matter of Life and Sex by Oscar Moore (1992)

A Meeting by the River by Christopher Isherwood (1967)

A Midsummer Night’s Dream by William Shakespeare (1590/6)

A Model World and Other Stories by Michael Chabon (1991)

A Month in the Country by J.L.Carr (1980)

A Nail, A Rose by Madeleine Bourdouxhe (1992)

A Passage to India by E.M.Forster (1924)

A Pelican at Blandings by P.G.Wodehouse (1969)

A Place I’ve Never Been by David Leavitt (1990)

A Planet for the President by Alistair Beaton (2004)

A Room with a View by E.M.Forster (1908)

A Season in Sinji by J.L.Carr (1967)

A Single Man by Christopher Isherwood (1964)

A Spot of Bother by Mark Haddon (2006)

A Study in Scarlet by Arthur Conan Doyle (1887)

Adrian Mole and the Weapons of Mass Destruction by Sue Townsend (2004)

Affliction by Russell Banks (1989)

Agatha Raisin and A Spoonful of Poison by M.C.Beaton (2008)

Agatha Raisin and the Day the Floods Came by M.C.Beaton (2002)

Agatha Raisin and the Love From Hell by M.C.Beaton (2001)

Agatha Raisin and the Murderous Marriage by M.C.Beaton (1996)

Agatha Raisin and the Perfect Paragon by M.C.Beaton (2005)

Agatha Raisin and the Potted Gardener by M.C.Beaton (1994)

Agatha Raisin and the Quiche of Death by M.C.Beaton (1992)

Agatha Raisin and the Terrible Tourist by M.C.Beaton (1997)

Agatha Raisin and the Vicious Vet by M.C.Beaton (1993)

Agatha Raisin and the Witch of Wyckhadden by M.C.Beaton (1999)

Agatha Raisin: There Goes the Bride by M.C.Beaton (2009)

Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll (1865)

All the Conspirators by Christopher Isherwood (1928/57)

Almodóvar mon amour by Jaime Royo-Villanova (2006)

Almonds and Raisins by Maisie Mosco (1991)

Amsterdam by Ian McEwan (1998)

An Ideal Husband by Oscar Wilde (1895)

Angels by Francis Fenn (1980)

Angels by Caroline Johnson (1993)

Angels and Men by Ladislaus Boros (1976)

Angels & Saints by George Otto Simms (1988)

Angels Angels All Around by Bob Hartman (1993)

Angels: God's Secret Agents by Billy Graham (1975/85)

Angels: Ministers of Grace by Geddes MacGregor (1988)

Antoine de Saint-Exupéry: The Life and Death of the Little Prince by Paul Webster (1993)

Aquamarine by Carol Anshaw (1992)

Arkansas by David Leavitt (1997)

Around the World in Eighty Days by Jules Verne (1873)

Art & Lies: A Piece for Three Voices and a Bawd by Jeanette Winterson (1994)

Art in Vienna 1898 - 1918 by Peter Vergo (1981)

Arthur: Book 3 of the Pendragon Cycle by Stephen Lawhead (1987)

At Risk by Stella Rimington (2004)

As the Pig Turns by M.C.Beaton (2011)

Atonement by Ian McEwan (2001)
Auntie Mame: An Irreverent Escapade by Patrick Dennis (2010)

Baal by Bertolt Brecht (1918/23)

Babycakes by Armistead Maupin (1984)

Be My Enemy by Christopher Brookmyre (2004)

Before She Met Me by Julian Barnes (1982)

Biedermann und die Brandstifter by Max Frisch (1953)

Black Dogs by Ian McEwan (1992)

Black Mischief by Evelyn Waugh (1932)

Black Robe by Brian Moore (1985)

Blandings Castle and Elsewhere by P.G.Wodehouse (1935)

Blue Horizons by Rabbi Lionel Blue (1989)

Boating for Beginners by Jeanette Winterson (1985)

Brave New World by Aldous Huxley (1932)

Brideshead Revisited by Evelyn Waugh (1945)
British Comic Stories by [Ed.] Patricia Craig (1991)

Brokeback Mountain by Annie Proulx (1997)

Bucket of Tongues by Duncan McLean (1992)

Byron Poems by [Ed.] A.S.B.Glover (1954)

Caracole by Edmund White (1985)

Carpe Jugulum by Terry Pratchett (1998)

Carry On Jeeves by P.G.Wodehouse (1925)

Cat’s Cradle by Kurt Vonnegut (1963)

Christianity, Social Tolerance, and Homosexuality by Prof. John Boswell (1980)

City of the Beasts by Isabel Allende (2002)

Cobalt by Nathan Aldyne (1982)

Codex by Lev Grossman (2004)

Colin: A Novel by E.F.Benson (1923)

Colin II by E.F.Benson (1925)

Collected Short Stories by E. M. Forster (1947)

Collins Easy Learning Spanish Dictionary, 2nd ed. (2001)

Coming From Behind by Howard Jacobson (1983)

Continent by Jim Crace (1986)
Contemporary Australian Short Stories by [Ed.] Murray Bail (1988) 
Contemporary Spanish Cinema by Barry Jordan & Rikki Morgan-Tamosunas (1988)

Conversations with Lord Byron on Perversion by Amanda Prantera (1987)

Courier Sud by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1929)

Cowboys & Indians by Joseph O’Connor (1991)

Das Brot der frühen Jahre by Heinrich Böll (1955)

David Copperfield by Chalres Dickens (1849/1850)

*De Kleine Prins by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1942)

Dead Souls by Ian Rankin (1999)

Decline and Fall by Evelyn Waugh (1928)

Departures & Arrivals by Eric Newby (1999)

Der aufhaltsame Aufstieg des Arturo Ui by Bertolt Brecht (1941/58)

Der gute Mensch von Sezuan by Bertolt Brecht (1939/43)

Der kaukasische Kreidekreis by Bertolt Brecht (1943/48)

Der Tod in Venedig by Thomas Mann (1912)

*Der Kleine Prinz by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1942)

Der Tunnel by Friedrich Dürrrenmatt (1952)

Die Dreigroschenoper by Bertolt Brecht (1928)

Die Physiker by Friedrich Dürrenmatt (1962)

Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep by Phillip K. Dick (1968)

Don't Step on the Lines by Ben Richards (1997)

Down There on a Visit by Christopher Isherwood (1962)

Dracula by Bram Stoker (1897)

Drei Männer Im Schnee by Erich Kästner (1934)

Dual Attraction: Understanding Bisexuality by Martin S. Weinberg, Colin J. Williams & Douglas W. Pryor (1995)

Duende: a Journey in Search of Flamenco by Jason Webster (2003)

Duffy by Dan Kavanagh (1980)

Dune by Frank Herbert (1963/5)

Dying Young by Marti Leimbach (1990)

E.M.Forster: A Life by P.N.Furbank (1977/8)

E.M.Forster: A Passage to India by [Ed.] Malcolm Bradbury (1970)

Earth King by Michael Youssef (1988)

 

*El Principito by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1942)

Emil und die Detektive by Erich Kästner (1929)

Enduring Love by Ian McEwan (1997)

Engel Erfahrungen und Reflexionen by Sophy Burnham (2003)

Entertaining Mr. Sloane by Joe Orton (1964)

Equal Affections by David Leavitt (1989)

Equal Rites by Terry Pratchett (1987)

Exhumations by Christopher Isherwood (1966)

Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer (2005)

Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury (1953)

Fairy Tales by Peter Cashorali (1997)

Family Dancing by David Leavitt (1984)

First Love, Last Rites by Ian McEwan (1975)

Fiskadoro by Denis Johnson (1985)

Flaubert’s Parrot by Julian Barnes (1984)

Flesh and Blood by Michael Cunningham (1995)

Floral Street by Simon Burt (1986)

Flowers for the Judge by Margery Allingham (1936)

Forest of the Pygmies by Isabel Allende (2005)

Forgetting Elena & Nocturnes for the King of Naples by Edmund White (1973 & 1978)

Friends, Lovers, Chocolate by Alexander McCall Smith (2005)

Frisk by Dennis Cooper (1991)

Full Dark House by Christopher Fowler (2003)

Full Moon by P.G.Wodehouse (1947)

Further Tales of the City by Armistead Maupin (1982)

Gabriel's Lament by Paul Bailey (1986)

Galahad at Blandings by P.G.Wodehouse (1965)

Generation X: Tales for an Accelerated Culture by Douglas Coupland (1991)

Going Postal by Terry Pratchett (2004)

Going to the Dogs by Dan Kavanagh (1987)

Goodbye to Berlin by Christopher Isherwood (1939)

Great Expectation by Charles Dickens (1860/1)

Gulliver’s Travels by Jonathan Swift (1726 & 1735)

Head to Toe by Joe Orton (1971)

Heavenly Date & Other Flirtations by Alexander McCall Smith (2003)

Heavy Weather by P.G.Wodehouse (1933)

Hector’s Hobbies by Annie Leith (1994)

Helena by Evelyn Waugh (1950)

Hinds' Feet on High Places by Hannah Hurnard (1955)

His Last Bow: Some Reminiscences of Sherlock Holmes by Arthur Conan Doyle (1917)

How to Read the New Testament by Étienne Charpentier (1982)

How to Read the Old Testament by Étienne Charpentier (1982)

Howards End by E.M.Forster (1910)

If It Die by André Gide (1926)

*Il Piccolo Principe by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1943)

Impossible Vacation by Spalding Gray (1992)

In Between the Sheets by Ian McEwan (1978)

In the Houses of the West by Christopher Burns (1993)
Independent Queer Cinema: Reviews and Interviews by Gary M. Kramer (2006)

Inside the Mind of Gene Roddenberry by Yvonne Fern (1995)

Issues Facing Christians Today by John Stott (1990)

Jack by A.M.Homes (1989)

Jesus' Son by Denis Johnson (1992)

Judaism: the Way of Holiness by Soloman Nigosian (1986)

John Betjeman's Collected Poems by John Betjeman (1979)

John Masefield Selected Poems by [Ed.] Donald E. Stanford (1984)

Journey to the Centre of the Earth by Jules Verne (1864/7)

JPod by Douglas Coupland (2006)

Knowledge of Angels by Jill Paton Walsh (1998)

La Chute by Albert Camus (1956)

Lake Wobegon Days by Garrison Keillor (1985)

Lantern Lecture by Adam Mars-Jones (1981)

Laughable Loves by Milan Kundera (1969)

Lawrence Durrell Collected Poems 1931 - 1974 by [Ed.] James A. Brigham (1980)

Le Malade Imaginaire by Molière (1673)

Le Morte d'Arthur by Thomas Malory (1485)

Le Nœud de vipères by François Mauriac (1933)

*Le Petit Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1943)

Leave it to Psmith by P.G.Wodehouse (1923)

Leben des Galilei by Bertolt Brecht (1937/43)

Less Than Zero by Brett Easton Ellis (1985)

Lighthousekeeping by Jeanette Winterson (2004)

Life After God by Douglas Coupland (1994)

Life Is Elsewhere by Milan Kundera (1973)

Like Mother by Jenny Diski (1988)

Like People in History by Felice Picano (1995)

Little Indiscretions by Carmen Posadas (2005)

Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov (1955)

Loot by Joe Orton (1965)

Lord of the Flies by William Golding (1954)

Love: Penhaligon's Scented Treasury of Verse and Prose by [Ed.] Sheila Pickles (1994)

Loving Promises by Helen Steiner Rice (1981) 

Loving Thoughts by Helen Steiner Rice (1985)

Lucia Rising by E.F.Benson (1920/7)

Lucia Victrix by E.F.Benson (1931/9)

Lunar Park by Brett Easton Ellis (2005)

Magic Seeds by V.S.Naipaul (2004)

Manchester England: The Story of the Pop Cult City by Dave Haslam (1999)

Manfred’s Pain by Robert McLiam Wilson (1992)

Mann Ist Mann by Bertolt Brecht (1924/6)

Marmaduke and His Friends by Elizabeth Chapman (1958)

Mary Ann in Autumn by Armistead Maupin (2010)

Maurice by E.M.Forster (1913/4)

Men & Friendship by Stuart Miller (1986)

Merlin: Book 2 of the Pendragon Cycle by Stephen Lawhead (1988)

Metroland by Julian Barnes (1980)

Michael Tolliver Lives by Armistead Maupin (2007)

Monstrous Regiment by Terry Pratchett (2003)

Moominsummer Madness by Tove Jansson (1955)

More Tales of the City by Armistead Maupin (1980)

Mountain of Spices by Hannah Hurnard (195?)

Mr Clive & Mr Page by Neil Bartlett (1998)

Mr. Norris Changes Trains by Christopher Isherwood (1935)

Much Obliged, Jeeves by P.G.Wodehouse (1971)

Muscle: Confessions of an Unlikely Bodybuilder by Sam Fussell (1991)

Mutter Courage und ihre Kinder by Bertolt Brecht (1938/41)

My Family and Other Animals by Gerald Durrell (1956)

My Dirty Little Book of Stolen Time by Liz Jensen (2006)

My Worst Date by David Leddick (1996)

New International Version Study Bible by Kenneth L. Barker (1985)

Night Swimmer by Joseph Olshan (1994)

Night Watch by Terry Pratchett (2002)

No Love Lost by Margery Allingham (1954)

Nothing Natural by Jenny Diski (1986)

Nothing Serious by P.G.Wodehouse (1950)

Notwithstanding by Louis de Bernières (2009)

Now & Then by William Corlett (1995)

Now We Are Six by A.A.Milne (1927)

Old Filth by Jane Gardam (2004)

Old Soldiers by Paul Bailey (1980)

On Chesil Beach by Ian McEwan (2007)

On The Road by Jack Kerouac (1947/51)

Oracle Night by Paul Auster (2003)

Oranges Are Not The Only Fruit by Jeanette Winterson (1985)

Our Father: Matthew 6 by Ruth Connell (1983)

O-Zone by Paul Theroux (1988)

Passing Through by Don Bloch (1988)

Passion Fruit: Romantic Fiction with a Twist by [Ed.] Jeanette Winterson (1986)

Phædrus by Plato (c.370BCE)

Philosophy Made Simple by Richard H. Popkin, Avrum Stroll, A.V.Kelly (1969)

Philosophy of Religion, fourth edition by John Hick (1989)

Philosophy of Science: the Natural Sciences in Christian Perspective by Delvin Lee Ratsch (1986)

Piercing the Darkness by Frank E. Peretti (1989)

Pilote de Guerre by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1942)

Poems on the Underground by [Eds.] Gerard Benson, Judith Chernaik & Cicely Herbert (1992)

Poetry of the Thirties by [Ed.] Robin Skelton (1985)

Pool by Ajay Sahgal (1994)

Postcards by Annie Proulx (1992) 

Postcards From No-Mans Land by Aidan Chambers (1999)

Prater Violet by Christopher Isherwood (1945)

Prophet: A Novel by Frank E. Peretti (1992)

Ready to Catch Him Should He Fall by Neil Bartlett (1992)

Religions of Star Trek by Ross S. Kraemer, William Cassidy, Susan L. Schwartz (2009)

Religious Education and Human Development by Michael Grimmitt (1987)

Religious Experience Today: Studying The Facts by David Hay (1990)

Resistance by Owen Sheers (2007)

Resuscitation of a Hanged Man by Denis Johnson (1991)

Right Ho, Jeeves by P.G.Wodehouse (1934)

Rhinocéros by Eugène Ionesco (1959)

Ring for Jeeves by P.G.Wodehouse (1953)

Rites of Passage by William Golding (1980)

Robert Frost Selected Poems by [Ed.] Ian Hamilton (1973)

Robinson by Christopher Petit (1993)

Rumpole and the Penge Bungalow Murders by John Mortimer (2005)

Saturday by Ian McEwan (2005)

Selected Poems Bertolt Brecht by [Ed.] K.Wölfel (1965)

Sexing the Cherry by Jeanette Winterson (1989)

Shampoo Planet by Douglas Coupland (1992)

Shelley Poems by [Ed.] Isabel Quigly (1956)

Shiva 3000 by Jan Lars Jensen (2000)

Shorter Oxford English Dictionary

Significant Others by Armistead Maupin (1987)

Sing the Body Electric: A Novel in Five Movements by Adam Lively (1993)

Skinned Alive: Stories by Edmund White (1995)

Skinny Dip by Carl Hiaasen (2004)

Smiling in Slow Motion by Derek Jarman (2001)

Something Fresh by P.G.Wodehouse (1915)

Sons and Lovers by D.H.Lawrence (1913)

Sophie’s Bakery for the Broken Hearted by Lolly Winston (2004)

Spring Fever by P.G.Wodehouse (1948)

Star Trek: Action! by Terry J. Erdmann & Paula M. Block (1998)

Star Trek Cookbook by Ethan Phillips & William J. Birnes (1999)

Star Trek: Ships of the Line by Michael Okuda, Doug Drexler, Margaret Clark (2006)

Star Trek Star Charts: The Complete Atlas of Star Trek by Geoffrey Mandel & Doug Drexler (2002)

Star Trek: Starship Spotter by Adam Lebowitz & Robert Bonchune (2001)

Star Trek: The Next Generation: Technical Manual by Rick Sternback & Michael Okuda (1991)

Star Trek The Next Generation: The Continuing Mission by Judith Reeves-Stevens & Garfield Reeves-Stevens (1997)

Star Trek: The Starfleet Survival Guide by David Mack (2002)

Staring at the Sun by Julian Barnes (1986)

States of Desire: Travels in Gay America by Edmund White (1980)

Stiff Upper Lip, Jeeves by P.G.Wodehouse (1963)

Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson (1886)

Summer Lightning by P.G.Wodehouse (1929)

Summer Moonshine by P.G.Wodehouse (1938)

Sunset at Blandings by P.G.Wodehouse (1977)

Sure of You by Armistead Maupin (1989)

Swallowdate by Arthur Ransome (1930)

Swallows & Amazons by Arthur Ransome (1931)

Tales of the City by Armistead Maupin (1978)

Tales of Toyland by Enid Blyton (1944)

Taliesin: Book 1 of the Pendragon Cycle by Stephen Lawhead (1987)

Ten Tales Tall & True by Alisdair Gray (1993)

Terre des Hommes by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1939)

Thank you, Jeeves by P.G.Wodehouse (1934)

The Achilles Heel Reader: Men, Sexual Politics & Socialism by Victor J. Seidler (1991)

The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain (1884)

The Adventures of Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens (1837/9)

The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes by Arthur Conan Doyle (1892)

The Adventures of Tom Sawyer by Mark Twain (1876)

The Alchemist by Paolo Coehlo (1988)

The Apes of God by Wyndham Lewis (1930)

The Archon Conspiracy by Dave Hunt (1989)

The Autograph Man by Zadie Smith (2002)

The Bay of Contented Men by Robert Drewe (1991)

The Beautiful Room is Empty by Edmund White (1988)

The Big Over Easy by Jasper Fforde (2005)

The Body & Society: Men, Women & Sexual Renunciation in Early Christianity by Peter Brown (1988)

The Book of Brownies by Enid Blyton (1926)

The Book of Guys by Garrison Keillor (1993)

The Book of Laughter and Forgetting by Milan Kundera (1978)

The Book of Revelation by Rupert Thomson (2000)

The Box of Delights by John Masefield (1935)

The Buddha of Suburbia by Hanif Kureishi (1990)

The Case-Book of Sherlock Holmes by Arthur Conan Doyle (1927)

The Catcher in the Rye by J.D.Salinger (1951)

The Celestial Omnibus (and other stories) by E.M.Forster (1911)

The Celtic Vision: Prayers and Blessings from the Outer Hebrides by Esther de Waal (1988)

The Cement Garden by Ian McEwan (1978)

The Charioteer by Mary Renault (1959)

The Christmas Mystery by Jostein Gaarder (1996)

The Chrysalids by Wyndham Lewis (1955)

The Code of the Woosters by P.G.Wodehouse (1938)

The Collected Poems of A.E.Housmann by A.E.Housmann (1967)

The Comfort of Strangers by Ian McEwan (1981)

The Common Experience by John Michael Cohen & John-Francis Phipps (1979)

The Concise Encyclopedia of Western Philosophy & Philosophers by James Opie Urmson & Jonathan Rée (1989)

The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time by Mark Haddon (2003)

The Day Job by Mark Wallington (2005)

The Day of the Triffids by Wyndham Lewis (1951)

The Daydreamer by Ian McEwan (1994)

The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire by Edward Gibbon (1776)

The Devil and Miss Prym by Paolo Coelho (2000)

The Enchanted Wood by Enid Blyton (1939)

The Eternal Moment and other stories by E.M.Forster (1928)

The Faber Book of Religious Verse by [Ed.] Helen Louise Gardner (1972)

The Farewell Symphony by Edmund White (1997)

The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition by Ira Steven Behr (2008)

The Final Boundary by Adrian Plass (1987)

The Folding Star by Alan Hollinghurst (1994)

The Food of Love by Anthony Capella (2004)

The Four Loves by C.S.Lewis (1960)

The Go-Between by L.P.Hartley (1953)

The Good Fairies of New York by Martin Millar (1992)

The Good Soldier by Ford Maddox Ford (1915)

The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood (1985)

The Happy Prince and Other Tales by Oscar Wilde (1888)

The Hobbit or There and Back Again by J.R.R.Tolkien (1937)

The Horizontal Epistles of Andromeda Veal by Adrian Plass (1988)

The Hound of the Baskervilles by Arthur Conan Doyle (1902)

The Horse and his Boy by C.S.Lewis (1954)

The House at Pooh Corner A.A.Milbe (1928)

The House of the Spirits by Isabel Allende (1982)

The Hums of Pooh by A.A.Milne (1972)

The Iliad by Homer (710-760 BCE)

The Immoralist by André Gide (1902)

The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde (1895)

The Inimitable Jeeves by P.G.Wodehouse (1923)

The Innocent by Ian McEwan (1990)

The Intimate Connection: Male Sexuality, Masculine Spirituality by James B. Nelson (1988)

The Invisible Man by H.G.Wells (1897)

The Islamic Tradition: an Introduction by Victor Danner (1988)

The King of Capri by Jeanette Winterson (2003)

The Kraken Wakes by Wyndham Lewis (1953)

The Last Battle by C.S.Lewis (1956)

The Last Hero by Terry Pratchett (2001)

The Last Juror by John Grisham (2004)

The Letters of Vincent Van Gogh by [Ed.] Ronald de Leeuw (1996)

The Life to Come and Other Stories by E.M.Forster (1903/60)

The Line of Beauty by Alan Hollinghurst (2004)

The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe by C.S.Lewis (1950)

*The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1942)

The Longest Journey by E.M.Forster (1907)

The Lord of the Rings by J.R.R.Tolkien (1954/5)

The Lost Language of Cranes by David Leavitt (1986)

The Loved One: An Anglo-American Tragedy by Evelyn Waugh (1948)

The Magic Faraway Tree by Enid Blyton (1943)

The Man Who Mistook His Wife For A Hat & Other Clinical Tales by Oliver Sachs (1985)

The Marriage of Likeness: Same-sex Unions in Pre-modern Europe by Prof. John Boswell (1994)

The Martian Chronicles by Ray Bradbury (1950)

The Master by Colm Tóibín (2004)

The Mating Season by P.G.Wodehouse (1949)

The Memoirs of Sherlock Holmes by Arthur Conan Doyle (1894)

The Memorial by Christopher Isherwood (1932)

The Mezzanine by Nicholson Baker (1988)

The Midwich Cuckoos by Wyndham Lewis (1957)

The Mysteries of Pittsburgh by Michael Chabon (1988)

The New York Trilogy by Paul Auster (1985/7)

The Nitpicker's Guide for Next Generation Trekkers Volume I by Phil Farrand (1993)

The Nitpicker's Guide for Next Generation Trekkers Volume II by Phil Farrand (1995)

The Notebook of Malte Laurids Brigge: The Journal of my other Self by Rainer Maria Rilke (1910)

The Odyssey by Homer (late C8th BCE)

The Once and Future King by T.H.White (1938/58)

The Ordeal of Gilbert Pinfold by Evelyn Waugh (1957)

The Other Side of the Dale by Gervase Phinn (1999)

The Page Turner by David Leavitt (1998)

The Paperchase by Marcel Theroux (2002)

The Passion by Jeanette Winterson (1987)

The Penguin Book of English Christian Verse by [Ed.] Peter Levi (1988)

The Physics of Star Trek by [Prof.] Lawrence M. Krauss (2007)

The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde (1890/1)

The Ploughman’s Lunch by Ian McEwan (1985)

The Poems of St John of the Cross by [Ed./tr.] Kathleen Jones (2001)

The Portable Walt Whitman by [Ed.] Mark van Doren (1977)

The Powerbook by Jeanette Winterson (2000)

The Return of Sherlock Holmes by Arthur Conan Doyle (1905)

The Revised Standard Version Common Bible (1984)

The Rules of Attraction by Brett Easton Ellis (1987)

The Sacred Diary of Adrian Plass Aged 37 3/4 by Adrian Plass (1987)

The Seeds of Time by John Wyndham (1956)

The Shape of Things to Come by H.G.Wells (1933)

The Shooting Party by Isabel Colegate (1980)

The Shipping News by Annie Proulx (1993) 

The Sign of Four by Arthur Conan Doyle (1890)

The Sisters Brothers by Patrick deWitt (2011)

The Sonnets and A Lover's Complaint by William Shakespeare [Ed.] John Kerrigan (1986)

The Star Trek Encyclopedia: A Reference Guide to the Future by Michael Okuda, Denise Okuda & Debbie Mirek (1999)

The Star Trek Next Generation Companion by Larry Nemecek (1995)

The Summer of the White Peacock by Simon Burt (1990)

The Swimming Pool Library by Alan Hollinghurst (1988)

The Tale of Two Bad Mice by Beatrix Potter (1904)

The Tax Inspector by Peter Carey (1991)

The Temple by Stephen Spender (1928)

The Tenth Man by Graham Greene (1985)

The Testament of Gideon Mack by James Robertson (2006)

The Third Man & The Fallen Idol by Graham Greene (1949 & 1948)

The Time Machine by H.G.Wells (1895)

The Time Traveller's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger (2004)

The Truth by Terry Ptratchett (2000)

The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera (1984)

The Valley of Fear by Arthur Conan Doyle (1915)

The War of the Worlds by H.G.Wells (1895/7)

The Way Ahead: a Visionary Perspective for the New Millennium by [Eds.] Eddie Shapiro & Debbie Shapiro (1992)

The Wee Free Men by Terry Pratchet (2003)

The Whole Duty of Man in Today's English by Michael Charles Perry (1980)

The Wild Life of Sailor and Lula by Barry Gifford (1991)

The World in the Evening by Christopher Isherwood (1954)

Then Again by Jenny Diski (1990)

Thief of Time by Terry Pratchett (2002)

This Book Will Save Your Life by A.M.Homes (2006)

This Present Darkness by Frank E.Peretti (1986)

Through the Looking-Glass, and What Alice Found There by Lewis Carroll (1871)

To Each His Own by Leonardo Sciascia (1966)

To The Goat by [Prof.] Peter Levi (1988)

Tonio Kröger by Thomas Mann (1903)

Towards a World Theology: Faith & the Comparative History of Religion by Wilfred Cantwell Smith (1981)

Tristan by Thomas Mann (1903)

Trouble with Lichen by Wyndham Lewis (1960)

Troubles by J.G.Farrell (1970)

Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea by Jules Verne (1869/70)

Very Good, Jeeves by P.G.Wodehouse (1930)

Vice Versa: Bisexuality & the Eroticism of Everyday Life by Marjorie B. Garber (1996)

Vile Bodies by Evelyn Waugh (1930)

Vol de Nuit Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1931)

Vox by Nicholson Baker (1992)

Vurt by Jeff Noon (1993)

Werewolves in Their Youth by Michael Chabon (1999)

What the Butler Saw by Joe Orton (1969)

Whatever Happened to Gloomy Gus of the Chicago Bears by Robert Coover (1987)

When We Were Very Young by A.A.Milne (1924)

Where Angels Fear to Tread by E.M.Forster (1905)

While England Sleeps by David Leavitt (1993)

William Blake the Complete Poems by [Ed.] Alicia Ostriker (1977)

Winnie-the-Pooh by A.A.Milne (1926)

Wolves Eat Dogs by Martin Cruz Smith (2004)

Women in Love by D.H.Lawrence (1920)

Wonder Boys by Michael Chabon (1995)

Work and Play by Carlo Gébler (1990)

Work Suspended and Other Stories by Evelyn Waugh (1949)

Written on the Body by Jeanette Winterson (1992)

Years From Now by Gary Glickman (1988)

Yours, Plum: The Letters of P.G.Wodehouse by [Ed.] James H. Heinemann (1990)

Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance: An Inquiry into Values by Robert M.Pirsig (1974)